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View Full Version : Does your wife or significant other HATE your cruiser?


lfd270ben
01-27-2007, 02:12 AM
I ran into this little problem since I bought my 40 my girlfriend has absolutely hated it :eek: she says she hates it because I spend more time with it than her :blah: she has even threatened to blow it up a few times :rolleyes: so I was wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences?

Rezarf
01-27-2007, 09:16 AM
Time to get a new gal! ;)

Stacy loves the cruiser, it is all about pacing yourself, and creating GOOD memories in the cruiser... like our first date, first campout, letting her drive, proposing to her after using the cruiser to get to our special spot...

... on the ride down she exlcaimed, "we can NEVER get rid of Maude now!" Maude is the cruiser.

Said with my best Hannibal voice from the A-Team, "I love it when a plan comes together!"

Drew

nuclearlemon
01-27-2007, 09:54 AM
if you love something, whomever you're with should love it to. if not, find someone who does.

Beater
01-27-2007, 11:06 AM
if you love something, whomever you're with should love it to. if not, find someone who does.

I disagree. (respectfully of course).

Laurie loves camping, but doesn't much like being on the trail for 8 hours while various people sort out their respective testosterone and estrogen levels..

She has fun driving the truck, but it's not her favorite thing.

She HATES fly fishing, but enjoys the time alone when I take the boy...

For years she couldn't understand my affair with 2 wheeled objects, and now she wants a faster motorcycle herself, and actually prefers to go for rides by herself once and a while..

It's about compromise and sacrifice. I have learned over 17 years to ask first, not for permission, but to plan ahead as to what the expectations are for free time... this saves a lot of hassles.

farnhamstj
01-27-2007, 11:19 AM
We had some good memories in the 40, camping, ect. Then the smell of gas/90w got to be too much, a least that's what my wife said. I believe it had much more to do with my spending too much time in the garage instead of with our child. We got a 100 series. garage time is now reduced, smell is better. Wife still didn't really care for wheeling until she spent time behind the wheel of an fj-cruiser on trail with someone other than me telling her how to drive. So, my advice to you is. 1. Make time for her and make an effort to enjoy whatever hobbies she has. 2. Do an off-road class together. 3. Don't talk to her about your truck, ever. 4. Let her drive it without you during the summer without top and doors. She'll enjoy the "nice jeep" comments she gets everwhere she goes. 5.If all else fails get a fj-cruiser.

Vitesse_6
01-27-2007, 12:58 PM
My wife like's both cruisers, She just does not like how much money i like to spend on it, I do have 2 kids in my favor, So neither are going anywhere.
If your GF isnt happy about the time you spend, and you lie he, Try to find a happy medium.
Good luck

corsair23
01-27-2007, 01:06 PM
I can't get my wife out of the LX450 :(

As for the FJ40 if I ever get it on a trail with her I think she'll feel the same way about it as well - for now it is just a money pit that sits in the garage and smells :)

You have to find a happy medium between time spent on the vehicle(s) and with your SO...Too much one way or the other can cause problems for either her OR you. One thing for sure, if the girlfriend doesn't like the Cruiser now and neither or you are willing to compromise in that regard, it won't get any better should you two decide to get married.

Good luck!

nuclearlemon
01-27-2007, 04:04 PM
i didn't say she had to participate in everything. she should love what you love because it's a part of you.

Chris
01-27-2007, 06:04 PM
My wife loves the cruiser, likes that I spend time working on it w/o her around too. I guess we have enough together time that she looks forward to my time with the cruiser, it gives her time for herself.

She was the one to suggest we go to CM06, she likes to get out of the city on weekends and enjoys vacations wandering. She would like to drive it more often on the trail though :D

:blah: :blah: :blah:

AxleIke
01-28-2007, 03:10 PM
cruiser, no, don't have one...4Runner, yes. Alot.

Rezarf
01-28-2007, 06:24 PM
i didn't say she had to participate in everything. she should love what you love because it's a part of you.

Ige, I think you're right on this.

Drew

Shark Bait
01-28-2007, 06:48 PM
Well, you posted up this thread after 2:00 AM and you posted up in another thread how you just spent over $1K on the cruiser. Many women have a hard time understanding that kind of behavior. I'm not saying you're a bad man. If you want to keep her, then you need to show her enough love that it doesn't matter what you do. Otherwise, I agree with the peanut gallery, find someone else. :rant:

Red_Chili
01-29-2007, 07:47 AM
Laurie loves camping, but doesn't much like being on the trail for 8 hours while various people sort out their respective testosterone and estrogen levels..

She has fun driving the truck, but it's not her favorite thing.

She HATES fly fishing, but enjoys the time alone when I take the boy...

For years she couldn't understand my affair with 2 wheeled objects, and now she wants a faster motorcycle herself, and actually prefers to go for rides by herself once and a while..

It's about compromise and sacrifice. I have learned over 17 years to ask first, not for permission, but to plan ahead as to what the expectations are for free time... this saves a lot of hassles.

We had some good memories in the 40, camping, ect. Then the smell of gas/90w got to be too much, a least that's what my wife said. I believe it had much more to do with my spending too much time in the garage instead of with our child. We got a 100 series. garage time is now reduced, smell is better. Wife still didn't really care for wheeling until she spent time behind the wheel of an fj-cruiser on trail with someone other than me telling her how to drive. So, my advice to you is. 1. Make time for her and make an effort to enjoy whatever hobbies she has. 2. Do an off-road class together. 3. Don't talk to her about your truck, ever. 4. Let her drive it without you during the summer without top and doors. She'll enjoy the "nice jeep" comments she gets everwhere she goes. 5.If all else fails get a fj-cruiser.

Wiser words never said. My wife referred to me as 'That Garage Troll' when I was building up the 4Runner. I made sure it was a time-limited project, and then planned a family camping trip with friends to inaugurate the Chili. That was a hoot, and a very good plan. I've tried to limit my garage time to when she is busy (or sleeping in...). I work from 6 to 2:30, so afternoons are good. Early Saturday mornings are too...

She's made piece with the fact that I am a gearhead and can never leave a truck or bike alone. I've modified her vehicle too, giving her the steps (aka rocksliders) she's always wanted. So it's kinda a blend of all the advice here, except to emphasize that you gotta use moderation.

FJBen
01-29-2007, 09:42 AM
It's about compromises! :D

When I work on my cruiser(s) I make sure to do it when it doesn't really affect the family...like after hours, after 9pm or 10...unless it's something that has to be done to make it work...lol

My wife likes crusiers...wants an 80/100 but just doesn't like off-camber/4 wheeling...waiting for 8 hours to go 4 miles and staring down the face of 200' dropoff's...something about :flop: hmmm I dunno...

be she knows how much I enjoy them, and she knows just how nice cruisers really are. They just need to fit everyone....:D She knows I like to take my rugrats in the mtns. cause thats what my parents did and I loved it!

Everything in moderation....

MDH33
01-29-2007, 10:45 AM
I guess I'm lucky too. My wife loves the 60, and she would probably love the 40 too but she can't reach the pedals and doesn't yet appreciate the 40 smell. :D She just rolls her eyes and smiles whenever I jabber on endlessly about Landcruisers and she never complains when I'm out working on them for hours. She's not into wheeling, but doesn't mind that I am, and she likes that I have hobbies of my own anyway.

However, she does wish they were faster... Turbo-charged 80 for her someday. ;)

leiniesred
01-29-2007, 11:05 AM
Lin doesn't like my truck because it is hard to get into and you get dirty the minute you come into contact with it. It smells, it's dusty, it's loud on the highway, and she gets tired of the bouncing on the trail sooner than I. She hates sitting in a line of trucks waiting for whatever reason. (let's face it, 50% of the time on the trail in a group trip you are sitting still!)

Now granted, the passenger seat is less fun than the driver's seat, but she doesn't like to drive it on trail after just a single incident where it wouldn't turn left, (but seemed more than willing to turn over). The cause has been removed along with the IFS and lockright, but her confidence has been shaken.

What can I do? 1: fix leaks for less stink. 2: finish the straps to help her get in the rig. 3: wash it! 4: wheel with the top on and rolled down or build a duster to keep dust from circulating forward into the cab area. 4: wheel with smaller groups (like 5 rigs max).

AxleIke
01-29-2007, 03:29 PM
I dissagree with "find another" idea.

Balance of time is key. But as for trying to do fun stuff, some folks just aren't into it. I think your right that you have to make a choice about the person you are with. If you absolutely need to spend every second with the truck, then yeah, you should find someone else.

But if you can compromise, then i think its just fine to stick with that person. I mean, i empathize with many of the complaints, I hate sitting behind trucks on a trail, can't imagine what its like for the person who isn't all that into wheeling anyway. I love my truck to death, but riding on a hwy for four plus hours in a rattling stiff ride gets on everyone's nerves, even a few 40 owners i know.

I think what has been said about balance is key. Make sure you spend time doing stuff that they love, and they'll be happy to let you sit out in the garage and screw around for as long as you like.

Shark Bait
01-29-2007, 11:12 PM
I disagree with "find another" idea.

I think what has been said about balance is key. Make sure you spend time doing stuff that they love, and they'll be happy to let you sit out in the garage and screw around for as long as you like.

What I must have been thinking maybe was that if she dumped him, find another. I totally agree, balance is important. I don't do a real good job of it either, mostly because I am gone a lot for real work and teaching scuba. I try to plan so I won't be gone two weekends in a row, or too many days in a row. But sometimes something comes up and it's hard to say no.

Jeanette doesn't hate any of the cruisers I have or have had. She isn't fond of getting in to a lifted vehicle. But when she's driving, she actually has a good time. I feel pretty lucky because she has been pretty tolerant of my hobbies. And me. :D

Jenny Cruiser
01-30-2007, 07:42 AM
My wife chose the 80 over a Honda Odyssey. To be honest, I never brought an Odyssey home. She drove our first 80 (95 2" lift) and said forget the minivan. She doesn't like being on the trail for more than an hour or two, but loves the fact that when we finally do stop there's noone/thing to be found.
She also likes my Scout, but won't ride in it because it has no seatbelts.

I don't usually tell her how much I spend on the cruiser unless she asks. If I have to tell, I make sure to throw as many key words such as 'sale' and 'great
deal' in there as I can to cushion the blow. :)

ginericLC
01-30-2007, 08:13 AM
This is a good topic.

One year in NW Cruisers there was like 5 divorces all in one year. I'm really not 100% sure that Cruisers had anything to do with any of the break ups. I think it more had to do with personality conflicts and people growing apart. Actually there were a lot of other things for some of them too. I'm laughing now as I recall some of them. Another interesting thing is some of these folks also lost interest in their Cruisers soon after the divorce.

My wife likes the Cruiser we have now well enough. She hated our V8j60. Mostly because I spent so much time with it. Over 5 years I spent almost 600 hours in the garage with it. A lot of that time was just sitting there thinking. Dang how should I do this. Much of that was my fault. I didn't have the skills or money necessary to do what I thought I could do. She seemed to like our stock 40 well enough. The rock crawling 40 we had she didn't like too much. Noisy, Hot, and drove like crap on the highway.

My wife does not like wheeling with me too often. She says that I get Testosterony and I have to push too far. She's OK if we are alone but when it is in a group setting she doesn't like going. Unless everyone else has a spouse and kids along. I think she likes that because they can get together and swap lies about our addictions.

My wife does love it that I take Gabe with me wheeling. I think I've only done two wheeling trips since he was one without him. CM last year and last month he didn't go because it was too cold. Winter run with snow in the mountains and near zero temps didn't seem like a good place for a 4 year old to be.

My wife did have a ball at CM 02. She spent a couple days on the trail and a couple days painting. She also enjoyed visiting with the diverse group of people. However, she usually uses her days off from teaching on a visit from her sister in the fall or art conferences or shows.

Money, since money doesn't grow on trees at our house Cruiser cash is always an issue. Sometimes it is a source of an argument. Somehow I manage to get by and my wife and I still get along in the end. But I don't get all of my wants and dreams. But of course she doesn't have some fancy horse that she probably wants in the back pasture either.

If you have good communication and respect for one another's interests you can probably make a go at it. If not, move onto greener pastures.

AxleIke
01-30-2007, 09:07 AM
well said

RockRunner
01-30-2007, 10:54 PM
I ran into this little problem since I bought my 40 my girlfriend has absolutely hated it :eek: she says she hates it because I spend more time with it than her :blah: she has even threatened to blow it up a few times :rolleyes: so I was wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences?

Now not every woman is into 4wheeling or fixing them, but that is what dating is about, finding out what each of you like and don't like. You do have to work at it and share time and hopefully hobbies. We share some things that we do together and then there are some things we do on our own. Time spend together is important as is time alone. Talk to her and let her know how important your hobby is to you and try to explain or show her what it is that you love so much. If she really can't stand it then maybe you need to sit down and talk, just make sure you gave it a true effort and you are fair about it.

My wife loves the "new" 4Runner, she drives it more than I do and can't wait till it is lifted and painted. She is a little upset that I spend so much time on the computer doing research on parts etc. Of course she was pretty happy when I picked up an extra front drive shaft for $25.00. We met when I had a 85 4Runner and this has brought back some real nice memories, we are going to try and relive some of them as soon as it warms up. I have always had a lifted vehicle untill 2000 when I stayed stock for 5 years, in teh mean time we lifted her 4Runner and suck on some 33"s. We added a cat back for some sound and she loved it. Now she has the FJ Cruiser and some of the mods she wants are right up my alley.

We are heading up to Moab during Memorial day and she will be doing most of the driving in the 4Runner, i won't be in the truck but I will be taking pictures. She is totally excited by this. She does not care for the big group stuff either as it moves to slow but a small group and she is fine untill the going gets rough and she gets out but I can't blame her.



Like I said she loves it and the dogs love it!!!

Spiderlegs
01-31-2007, 12:17 AM
Does taking a bat to the cruiser or pushing it off a cliff qualify for Hate??? No it hasnít happened, but this has been a topic of conversation. I think I have put Spiderlegs through worse without exercising extreme prejudice on my part. In the unlikely event of a cliff diving incident I have taken the time to get a real appraisal and full coverage for $263 a year for full coverage. Yes this includes a small amount of towing. I really need to check to see my policy covers random acts of bat violence