View Single Post
  #1470  
Old 06-17-2014, 10:29 AM
60wag's Avatar
60wag 60wag is offline
Rising Sun Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,778
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blindranger View Post
bound to go viral, T-Minus 3, 2, 1...

http://shreveport.craigslist.org/cto/4523579610.html
copied for posterity:

post
[ account ]0 favorites CL >shreveport >all for sale / wanted >cars & trucks - by owner
— — —reply ✉ ☎ reply x prohibited[?] Posted: 20 hours ago
Our teenager is an idiot. - $5500
© craigslist - Map data © OpenStreetMap(google map) (yahoo map)

condition: good

1996 lexus lx450 odometer: 154776 automatic transmission title : clean
Our teenage son is an idiot.


There he was. His future was bright. A week away from high school graduation, he was college bound and poised to inherit the Holy Grail of his teenage years. The truck he had been pining away for his entire adolescent existence. Mom's truck.

In a universe full of mystery, this young man's biggest questions in life were, 'How can I exist in the presence of such a bad ass truck and not be allowed to touch it?' And 'When's dinner?'. But I digress......

1 week before we were going to give him the truck, it came to light that the little **** got married in a clandestine ceremony in South Carolina over spring break. He came back home like nothing had happened.

As his blushing and surprisingly older bride came to town to claim her new husband, we had to tell the happy new couple that they would NOT be receiving the coveted truck. We did not want it eventually sold to pay the divorce lawyer. We'd rather sell it to you, you lucky, lucky people.


The specs:

1996 Lexus LX450
154,776 miles / Full time 4 wheel Drive / Powered by a 4.5 liter, twin-cam, four-valve inline-six engine that produced 215 HP and 275 lb*ft of torque. . A four-speed automatic transmission drives all four wheels through a permanent four-wheel-drive system. Maximum towing capacity of 5,000 pounds. Both front and rear axles are solid. Externally, the LX 450 is identical to the J80 series Land Cruiser, with the exception of the grille, side body cladding, and wheels. Which means any replacement parts you need are identical to the Toyota Land Cruiser which are at a lower cost than the Lexus. (Copied from Internet)

Have you reached that moment in your life that every single person on this planet dreads? You know exactly what I'm talking about. Your teenager is old enough to drive, and you need to buy them a car.

While no parent wants to go through this personal hell, why not make sure that your kid is driving a tank? Think about it for a minute.

You know there are thousands of morons on the road, texting, not paying attention to what they are doing. I've got 5000 pounds of pure steel right here that says your kid is going to be just fine if some moron hits them.

Another awesome thing about this truck is that it cruises. The light turns green, your kid stomps on the gas, the mighty beast goes, like a gentle giant, powerful yet reasonably paced as it's getting up to speed.

Drag racing? Nope. Tokyo drift? Nope. Driving like the responsible, level headed young adult you've always hoped they'd be? You bet your sweet bippy they are in this truck.


Are you a hunter? Tell your dog to move over, because this truck is your new best friend. It's got full time 4 wheel drive, my friends. There isn't anywhere this truck can't go.

With it's 3rd row seating, there is plenty of room to bring all of your huntin' buddies along. A man cave on wheels accurately describes this testosterone laden vehicle. It screams "Hunt, Kill, I am all that is man!" And you will be. Yes You will.

This truck is perfect for anybody, really.

$5500. Buy it today before your teenager ruins their life and breaks your heart.

We had to take our phone number off of this ad. My poor husband can't handle the stress. Emails only, please.
__________________
Bruce
'96FZJ80
'03 KTM 450EXC
"If you know what you're doing, then you aren't learning anything." - A. Lincoln
Reply With Quote